She's just not that into me

You know what I love the most about blogging? It's like whenever I go out on a limb and publish how awesome something is, it blows up in my face. Is there some hidden blog juju I am unaware of? Geez. So the chick I was swooning over, D just basically told me...wait...no she just outright told me that (paraphrasing with my favorite therapy speak) she isn't through processing her last relationship and that she is looking for more of a friend. Gah. Well at least I have something solid to discuss in my next therapy sessions. But crap, this one was going really well and I was really hoping it would lead somewhere.

So last month, after my breakup with JC, I read the book He's Just Not That Into You at the urging of my sister. Well, it is an interesting read. Although it is so freaking herterobiased it makes some really good points. Basically you have to believe that you are the bomb and not trip if someone isn't into you because you will find someone who is. And that people's behaviors dictate how they fell about you. Do they follow through and keep promises, or do they flake? I really recommend that everyone check it out at least once, it's a short read and is a challenge to most of the things we are taught about men & relationships as women. I think it is meant to save women a lot of time worrying about if a guy is into them or not.


Because I have come late to the lesbian party, I am not sure how this theory translates. Maybe someone needs to write a She's Just Not That Into You book. My plan is to step waaaaaaay back with D. I obviously can't continue to pump so much of my time and energy into something if there is no future. And I am going to attempt to erase the prospect from my mind. The only problem is that she still wants to be friends. And I know myself. I will probably hold a candle for the girl as long as we are talking. So what to do? I really wish I had more experience with these things so I could figure this out. 


On the bright side of things, I went to my first Queer Anarchist study group last night. Holy fuck it was awesome. My pal, Chaos planned it. It was such an amazing and inspiring meeting. It was the first time I had ever discussed what being queer and what being an Anarchist meant to me and in turn I got to listen to other people's experiences. I realized that this community and the Zine community that Chaos has so kindly invited me into are the places where I am going to flourish and grow. These is my people, y'all! I am blessed to find such an inspiring community. Shout out to Chaos! You are the bomb!


In even better news, I booked myself a flight and room to go to the Portland Zine Symposium in August. Chaos, AK and AG, companieras from the Coachella Zine shenanigan are all heading up there for some good times. Can't wait to tear up the city with these ladies. A total bonus to being single, you get to do whatever the fuck you want. Hellz yes!

So in the end D might not be that into me. But you know what, I am. And that's all that matters. Hi-yah!